A Few Things To Consider About Owning A Dog

In case any of you are considering getting a dog, I feel it my duty to warn you:
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It will be YOU who has to clean up poop, puke, and any other mess in the house from the dog.

It will be YOU who has to pick dog hair off all your clothes, dishes, couches.

It will be YOU vacuuming 5 times a week to get rid of said dog hair.

It will be YOU who gets woken up from a nap because your dog is barking at the birds outside. Or the neighbor kids. Or the wind. Or nothing at all.

It will be YOU who can’t get flowers to grow outside because your dog digs them up.

It will be YOU chasing your dog all over the neighborhood.

It will be YOU who drives an hour each time you go out of town so that your dog can have a babysitter.

It will be YOU who forsakes getting your own hair cut so that instead you can spend the money on a bark collar, dog food, or grooming.

It will be YOU cleaning up muddy paw prints off the kitchen floor, scratch marks off your walls, and doggy nose wipes off your car windows.

It will be YOU who exhausts herself cleaning the carpets on Tuesday only to come down Wednesday and see that the dog has, yet again, pooped inside.

It will be YOU who threatens to give the dog away, only to watch your children collapse in crying. Why, Mommy, why, would you give away the dog?