And I need all kinds of different moms in my world to help me be better at this big crazy job of motherhood.
The one that I was pregnant with.
Remember that one time I showed up on your porch when I was pregnant with my first. Crying. For no apparent reason. Except maybe that I thought my husband didn’t understand? And then in a hormonal rage I said some 4-letter words to him? You brought me back down to the planet earth. You were a couple months ahead of me and you knew what was happening.
The one that was less cautious than me, who taught me to chill the *@#$ out.
You know the mom. At first you look at her and you are like what the *@#$ are you doing? And a few minutes later you’re like “I’m a helicopter parent. Maybe I need to chill the *@#$ out.” And then you send your kid off to do the same thing. Maybe it’s walking to the store for the first time on their own to buy treats, or riding some crazy contraption down the street, but we all need that mom who helps us give our kids a little more leash.
The one who watched out for me on the first day of school when I’d come home alone.
You knew. You were there last year. I wore sunglasses all day and you checked in with me multiple times. Sending your youngest off for all day school is a big day that signals big changes. I’m glad you went before me.
The one who introduced me to yoga pants and the proper way to wear them.
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Those are the cool kids. The ones who understood right out of the gates that yoga pants are an underwear no fly zone. Everyone needs that friend, the one that you can ask “Hey – do I wear underwear with these?”.
The ones I use my big girl words with.
To those moms that I escape out to dinner in the dark of the night with. The ones who I use grown up words with and giggle until it hurts. The ones who can hear anything, are up for anything, and wouldn’t judge me even if I did wear underwear with my yoga pants.
The one who told me that they think teenagers are fun.
I’m scared. Teenagers are jerks right? I think I was. But that empty nester that told me that teenagers were her favorite of all and told me all of the reasons why? I need to be her. She gave me a different perspective on the years that are coming for me full speed.
The one that has younger kids than me, and asked me for parenting advice, and then acted like it was valid and useful.
We’re all winging it – but something makes you feel validated when someone trusts you enough to ask for parenting advice – and then actually thinks it was helpful. It makes me feel like I’m actually learning something from this whole parenting journey.
To you, and all of the other moms out there who’ve given me advice: