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Fifty Shades of Anxiety

Sometimes I need a hug or a cry or a prayer or a VHS tape viewing of Fried Green Tomatoes. But always, always, I feel better with a new coat of paint on my toenails.

I was thinking of who my write-in vote for President will be when I realized that I would never be a plausible candidate. While I'm awesome in an emergency (yep it's true), I don't stand up well over time. Given weeks on end of constant busy-ness, I eventually feel stymied and put it all down for an hour of nail painting. I can just imagine myself as president:

"Madam President, will the US become involved in Israel and Egypt's growing border conflicts with Sinai?"

"I'll get back to you after I paint my toenails purple."


In real life, to-do lists, work, laundry, volunteer positions, the growing piles of mail and papers, and unpacked bags (if it's the night before family travel, and you know what those nights are like) will eventually weigh so heavily on me that I just shut down. My chest feels squished, I feel overwhelmed, and my mood and outlook become dour. Don't get me wrong, all the stuff gets done -- and what doesn't get done probably isn't that important anyway. The problem is mostly internal, and it's something I've struggled with for years.

Sometimes I need a hug or a cry or a prayer or a VHS tape viewing of Fried Green Tomatoes. But always, always, I feel better with a new coat of paint on my toenails.

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Today it's a sparkly burgundy red called La Boheme. With ten pretty toes in a row, I've got something under control and am ready for the next big push.

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