11 Things I’m Really, No Seriously, Going to Do in 2011 Even If It Kills Me and It Probably Will

I'm not having resolutions this year, I'm having "Things." "Things" make me feel like my resolution list is less about some out there goal and more like an awesome checklist that I can mark off as I accomplish them.

1. Have a Baby

Yes, I’m expecting a baby. From what I understand (and the experience of two older children) this baby will be born. It’s inevitable, so I might as well put it on the list. Call it a mulligan if you must.

2. Paint My Bedroom

When I told my mom I’ll be painting my bedroom navy she asked if I was insane. The answer to that question is, “The voices in my head say I’m not.” It so happens that the voices in my head sound a lot like Candace Olsen from Divine Design. I’ve had paint swatches on the rosy pink walls for four months, 2011 is the year of No More Pink Bedrooms. Why is my bedroom pink? Because neither you nor I used to live here.

3. Finish my Dining Room Table

I built a dining table last fall. Yes, I really did. OK, I started it, and when my arms were unable to hold the 2X6s square enough to screw into each other, my husband helped. This is the year when I sand, stain, and seal the table. And stabilize it so that it doesn’t wobble. Swearsies.

4. Honest to Goodness Wardrobe Change-outs

It’s been said that a lady puts away her summer wardrobe after Labor Day and puts her winter wardrobe away after Memorial Day. I want to be better at doing the clothing switch-out, not just for me but for my kids. No more taking up valuable dresser drawer space with shorts in January.

5. So Help Me, Clear Off My Desk

6. Mending Clothes

My 7-year-old’s pants are for single use only--or at least that’s how he treats them. The knees come back ripped out within a couple days; it’s ridiculous. I’m going to be thriftier by patching those suckers. I think we might toss good clothes away too quickly, so I’ll do a better job of mending their tears and missing buttons.

7. Potty Train my Three-Year-Old

Guys. This is really going to kill me. It IS killing me. My stars. He owes me so big time. He better grow up to be a Noble prize winner, or Justin Bieber, or something.

8. Start Some Seeds

I bought seeds, dirt, and bio-degradable containers for starting plants! I bought them...last year. This year I will actually start those plants.

9. Plant those Plants

I know myself, unless I’m accountable, I will absolutely start my seeds and then leave them in the little containers until they root-bind, rot, and die. For the love of Gaia, I will plant those seeds in an actual patch.

10. Get The Pumpkin Off My Porch.

It’s January. It’s the END of January. By the hammer of Thor...

11. Watch More TV

Oh, come on, that’s an awesome goal. You’re jealous you didn’t think of it first.