Every parent knows the drill: some days are great, some are just okay, and others feel downright hard. For kids, those hard days can feel endless—and for parents, it can be tough to reassure them that things won’t always feel that way.
On The Mel Robbins Podcast, entrepreneur Emma Grede shared a mindset tool she lives by: the Rule of Thirds. It’s simple, memorable, and something families can use to put tough moments into perspective.
What Is the Rule of Thirds?
Emma explains that anytime you’re pursuing a goal, building a skill, or just living life, you can expect:
- One-third of the time: You’ll feel great. Things are going well, you’re confident, and you’re motivated.
- One-third of the time: You’ll feel neutral. It’s not amazing, but it’s not terrible—it’s just steady.
- One-third of the time: You’ll feel lousy. Things aren’t working, you’re tired, or you feel stuck.
The point? Hard days aren’t a sign that something is wrong. They’re simply part of the natural cycle of growth.
Why This Matters for Families
- It normalizes struggle. Kids (and parents!) realize it’s not unusual to feel bad sometimes—it’s built into the process.
- It takes away pressure. No one has to expect life to feel good all the time.
- It builds resilience. Knowing “this is just the tough third” makes it easier to push through instead of giving up.
- It keeps perspective. Even a bad day is temporary, and a better third is always coming.
Talking About the Rule of Thirds
You can use dinner time or bedtime chats to help your kids reflect on their day with this simple mindset tool:
- Which third do you think today felt like—great, okay, or tough? Why?
- When you have a “tough third” day, what helps you keep going?
- Can you remember a time when you had a hard day, but things turned around the next day?
- How do you think our family can support each other when someone is in their “tough third”?
- What’s one small thing you can do tomorrow to move toward a better third?
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We Shouldn’t Feel Good All the Time
As Emma Grede reminded listeners, “We shouldn’t feel good all the time.” Accepting the Rule of Thirds takes the pressure off of being perfect and gives kids (and parents) a practical way to ride the waves of life.
So next time your child has a meltdown over homework or feels defeated after a game, remind them: this is just the tough third. Better days are part of the cycle too.
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