I have recently decided to say no. My two year old daughter continues to inspire me. How easily she says no- without having to call her therapist or ask all of her friends what “she should do.”
It is fascinating how much we say yes without even checking in with what we want to do. When I filed for divorce, numerous people wanted to tell me how hard it was going to be as a single mom. The more time passed, the more I understood why things can be so challenging. In my marriage I did everything to make my ex husband happy. I played a role and said yes when I really wanted to be saying no. I denied and kept hidden parts of me that wanted to play out of making sure my ex was okay. I see this all around me. Our need to get approval outweighs our own inner knowing.
My daughter teaches me through example. I understand more and more that it is not my job to tell her how she should be, only my job to be the example for her on what it means to value myself. When I choose to value myself I check in with ME first before saying yes to all the agendas being brought my way. I say no without apology and continue to trust my own inner wisdom. I share with her that I am willing to play in the strength of who I am, not ignore it.
When we say no to muting our own power, we begin to live in magical ways. Our children witness authentic power and someone living by their own set of joyful rules. Instead of telling our children to love themselves they learn by seeing us put our selves first, without guilt.
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We are living in new times. It is time for all women to begin to say no that voice within them that says “Do not put yourself first.” This voice was taught to us, but it not our truth. The more we respect and honor what it is our heart desires the more the world will continue to shift and open up to the truest meaning of self love.