Momma Play!

I crave a time where a new mom comes in to my classes and celebrates her body and all it has done for her and her child. It would be a different world if we all talked and shared what we love about ourselves wouldn't it?
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 There is a lot of hype around becoming a mother. To work or not work (like staying at home is not work?), sacrificing your time and energy, maintaining a relationship with your partner/husband and what to do with the weight you had gained during pregnancy. I always found it interesting the rules and beliefs that are so deeply programmed into our precious womanly cells. When I teach mom and baby playoga classes the first thing women say is they want to lose their bellies. Even after a miraculous experience of birth, where the body was the most powerful vehicle of creation, we still want to change it. The idea that perfection is something that will make it all easier is what causes imbalance. I crave a time where a new mom comes in to my classes or to a park and celebrates her body and all it has done for her and her child. It would be a different world if we all talked and shared what we love about ourselves wouldn't it?

When I became surprisingly pregnant I faced all those fears and beliefs I had held onto without ever knowing it. The words kept flying out of me, perfect, right, good, bad, stretch marks, messed up, sacrifice, balance, work, career; so much that I could rarely get a breathe in. This was the coolest part of the process. I have always believed that in order to not become my mom I would really have to look at what I believe about myself. Although it felt challenging to discover I too had judgments and fears about becoming a mom, it was freeing to look them right in the eye. There is no way we can heal and re -create who we are without looking at what we are not. 

When we can look at parts of ourselves with a light heart, it can become more of a playful ride. Play is a perspective. When I am judging myself or other moms for their decisions there is something I need to look at that is out of balance within me. We judge and separate, causing more separation within ourselves more and more. This is a universal epidemic, and yes it is an epidemic. The pressure we have from society is a reflection of the pressure we all put on ourselves. Period. 

Yes, this brings the responsibility back to beautiful you. In a society where there are ten steps to a thinner, brighter, happier, wealthier you, I question why we are still searching for it? What causes imbalance is when we begin to feel as if we need to live like others. What causes imbalance is when we take a "one size fits all" rule and belief and try to make everyone follow it. If I 100% know who I am and feel very comfortable with my choices (that change and flow in each moment) then why would I feel the need to tell you how to live? Why would I truly care?

Enough with the books. Enough with asking experts about helping us find balance. There is nothing to find, only remember. This is an adventure. We do not have to get it right all the time, we can lighten up on ourselves and learn form choices that may have not felt "good." We can begin to demonstrate trust of self to our children, stop this reaching out to others to tell us who we are business.

The power that we innately have is fantastic. For my entire life I asked everyone around what I should do about my life. Even a few months ago I felt so out of balance and unclear. I could not find the humor and lightness in my choices. My husband and I were thinking about separating and I had to call 10 friends to see if I should do it. It felt heavy, unclear, distracting and an overload of other peoples ideas about MY life. Yikes!

The moment I stop asking the world what I should do, is the moment I am in balance. This is our life to live, our "play" to direct. Be in charge of your own- trust your heart and gut. Lighten up when you make "mis-takes" and enjoy the ride. Balance is not a this or that, it is a word that society has assigned to a void in which we are feeling. We do not give ourselves permission to play. Play sets us free to express and discover who we are in all areas of our lives. I thank my daughter for empowering me to look at myself in the mirror of her eyes. When she falls down or does something the "wrong" way, she laughs out loud and moves on to the next big adventure.

It's time to bring back that. To see life as a tremendous opportunity to discover and share who we are.

Let's play.

-Jenny Ward, www.PlayWard.com

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