Guest Post from Christine Borja:
It was the last week of January when I found out we were going to have another baby. My husband, Eugene and I were both thrilled and scared at the same time. We have two wonderful sons, Zamiel, 5, and Xavier, 2. Last Summer I became pregnant, but 6 weeks into the pregnancy I had a miscarriage. The loss was unbearable. From that point on we decided to not have any more kids. The funny thing is, neither one of us really took the next step to truly preventing another pregnancy from happening. I looked at the “pregnant” sign staring at me as I held the test in my hand and I became teary-eyed. I prayed to God this time around would be different and I would be able to go full-term.
A few weeks went by and we decided to tell our kids that they would have another sibling. Our oldest son was ecstatic about having another brother or sister. Our youngest seemed happy, but we could tell he didn’t truly understand he wasn’t going to be the baby anymore. In time, we figured he would understand. As I mentioned earlier our oldest, Zamiel, was really excited about a new little one joining the family. He was extremely sweet with me, rubbing my tummy, saying hi to his “Ading,” which means younger sibling in Filipino, and even kissing my tummy. It seemed like he would continue to be a great big brother, like he is now with Xavier.
Eugene and I have always said it wouldn’t matter whether we were having a boy or girl, just as long as the baby is healthy and he or she is equipped with all the necessary body parts. In the beginning, Zamiel would make little comments here and there saying he hopes it’s going to be a girl…and a boy! The first time I heard him say that, I just brushed it off. But, he kept saying it. I started to think, “Oh goodness! What if I’m having twins?” I started thinking of all the reasons why we could be having twins – all the dreams about having twins, showing a lot quicker this time around, and eating all the time. These thoughts obviously started to surface before I had my first ultrasound. After my first ultrasound though, it was confirmed that we were only going to have one baby. Phew!
After knowing my boys were going to have one more sibling, Zamiel would continue to ask questions about the baby. “What’s her name? How big is she?” It was quite funny and cute how he thought he was going to have a sister. But, one particular conversation really amazed me and led me to think perhaps my son has psychic abilities. I was giving him a bath one evening when he says to me, “Mommy, I have a brother, and now I’m going to have a sister.” I asked him to repeat himself, and he did. He also said, “In December, I’m going to give her a bow.” I looked at him with a smile and asked, “How do you know the baby in mommy’s tummy is a girl?” He didn’t have to say a word, because the look on his face said it all. It was one of those looks where he’s basically saying, “I just know, so don’t question me.” I had to tell Eugene afterwards, and the story definitely made him laugh and smile.
Ever since that night, Zamiel has been making comments about having a baby girl in the house. My parents live with us and all together there are 4 boys and 2 girls in our home. Being convinced he’s having a sister, Zamiel now says, “There are 4 boys and soon there will be 3 girls.” We all just look at him and smile. I hope he’s not too disappointed if he ends up with another brother, but I highly doubt he would be. With all the things that he’s been saying, perhaps God is telling us something through Zamiel. Maybe I should start thinking pink?